What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

What would have happened if Shin was a good movie instead of a bad one?

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

What habits do happy couples have?

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Why are American women so ugly nowadays?

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Eating More of These Foods May Lower Your Cancer Risk by 8%, New Study Suggests - EatingWell

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

All international travelers should get measles vaccinations, CDC says - AP News

TEXT:

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

ISS Research & Development Conference Cancellation - NASA Watch

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Could Mauricio Pochettino leave USMNT for Tottenham?: 'It's not realistic' - FOX Sports

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Why are fewer English people going to their local pubs for a drink? Are they aware that many pubs are shutting down due to lack of customers?

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

My boyfriend always verbally abuse me and makes me cry. If I try to tell him how hurt I was, he says to me he loves me and can't hurt me but always abuse me. Why?

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

What are examples of real life forced feminization?

Make Nazis afraid again!

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

A Japanese lander crashed on the Moon after losing track of its location - Ars Technica

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.